Memories

Laptop in her lap, phone clutched in one hand, specs with dried tear stains still on, she had drifted off to sleep, unknowingly and this had been happening for the past couple of days. Sleep made her forget everything for a while. Everything seemed to be perfect in her dream world. She had been looking at their old pics in her laptop but then sleep got the better of her. The people in the pic were different now. Changed. Strange. But she liked looking at the old pics, the only reason being, no matter how much they had drifted apart, the memory was still there. Memories don't change. It's like they are imprinted in our minds.If only pictures could talk like in Harry Potter. She wished there was a Pensieve where she could revisit all her memories and relive those moments. 

She was missing their stupid conversations, those all-nighters - they would give up sleep for, their fights and the sweet talks after, the teasing which would never go too far for they knew when to stop, clicking loads of pictures not because she liked doing it but because they insisted...She had a habit of reliving these moments by looking at the photos. She was ready to give up anything for one phone call, just like old times..Yes, she wanted to shout and scream at them and make them listen but somewhere deep down she knew she didn't have it in her. It seems like it was only yesterday that they were all laughing together, pulling each other's leg while sipping coffee. 

So, to get rid of the heavy feeling growing in her chest, she was used to going through old pictures for hours and smiling like an idiot. She had spent hours & days & weeks & months, deliberating on the feeling that she was at fault somehow, she just didn't know yet, but sometimes it's no one's fault, it's the circumstances that are wrong. Everyone has got their own reasons, maybe they had too, she only wished they'd have tried explaining it to her rather than giving up so easily. The memories were all she could hold on to and she had no choice but to accept what is. She wanted to tell them how she felt but all she could type was, "How r you?Long time no see." and wait for the response, if at all it they cared enough to do so.

Her phone vibrated and the notification showed one unread message. She unlocked her phone to read the message and it was the one she expected but had hoped against ,"Was busy, would call you some other time." She glanced at the clock and it told her it was midnight. She realized she should probably wrap everything up and wait for the next day when she would put a smile on her face because it was easier than explaining the tumult of thoughts going on in her head.

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From the Hogwarts Express to Eternity

A hot cup of coffee, a couple of blankets and a Harry Potter novel - a perfectly good way to spend a long & cold winter night. Sometimes, it makes me wonder, how a novel changes our way of thinking completely. You start believing in things like magic, you start wishing that a flick of wand would make everything fall into place...But the part that always reaches out to my heart is the bond of friendship shared between Harry and Hermione.

Their journey had begun on the Hogwarts Express and as J.K.Rowling has well said,"There are some things you can’t share without ending up liking each other, and knocking out a twelve-foot mountain troll is one of them." From that point on, this little journey never wavered. I just love the way they laugh together, fight with each other but then go back to being as if nothing had ever happened because they have important stuff to share, the way they can always rely on each other. While reading Harry Potter, somewhere deep down, I always pictured both of them getting together and I was annoyed a lot when it was Ron and not Harry.

There have been times when I've felt envious of Hermione for having a friend like Harry. She doesn't have to say it out loud for him to understand, one look at her and he knows something is bugging her. When they are together there is no such thing as awkward silence, because even silence is equally comfortable for both of them. She was ready to face his wrath rather than getting him into a life endangering situation..Apparently,she didn't understand Quidditch the way he did but there was no joking around when it was his life at stake.They had never confided about their feelings for Ginny or Ron to each other, but somehow it was never necessary.

I know, I did not mention Ron anywhere..and admittedly he was a very integral part of their lives but I couldn't help myself but think about the times when a silent war was going on between Ron and Hermione or a tiff between Harry and Ron..Even during these times, there was not a single time that Harry and Hermione's friendship took a detour.They always had each other's back, be it while fighting a giant snake in Godric's Hollow or while completing a Potion's essay. Ron always used to come around after leaving but Harry..he never left and that always touches my heart. 

Frankly speaking, I am a bit obsessed with Harry Potter..It doesn't matter how many times I've read it, I still enjoy rereading it over and over again. It's true how some stories stay with us till eternity and so will Harry Potter.While most of the girls dream of having a perfect boyfriend like they show in the movies and novels..Here I am, dreaming of having a best friend like Harry. Harry Potter made me realize that sometimes a best friend can understand you a bit more than you do yourself.

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Embracing the Inevitable

Everyone, during each phase of their life, has had that one friend with whom they do the kind of random stuff which may be perceived as childish or silly if viewed from a third person's perspective. Am I right ? Yes?

Well, I know that..because when she says "Let's play our game", I know what she is talking about.

We have done all sorts of random stuff , where she pretends to be me and I pretend the other way round or the rapid fire where we cross question each other just to check how much we know about each other and get mad if the other person answers incorrectly..But the most exciting "game" of ours was exchanging quotes. Yeah, I know you guys wouldn't find it so interesting but trust me, we used to love it..sending random screenshots of quotes to each other was "our thing".

So, we were just talking the other day, a lil of this, a lil of that, when she shoots a question at me,"When are u gonna publish your second post??" I was quiet for a moment because frankly, I had no clue what I was gonna write about. "Why don't you suggest me something and I'll give it a go", I said, oblivious to the fact that she had the idea all set in her mind.

It's funny, how day by day nothing changes but when you look back, everything is different. This was what she replied and said, " How about this??."

I was all set to write about this particular quote, but it's a bit frustrating when you have a great thought but can't find a way to put it into words.So I quit fiddling with the keys of my keyboard and started listening to music instead. It was today, that she reminded me of my pending post and I gave it a whirl. 

Changes - well, I was the kind of girl who was never up for changes because I always had it fixed in my mind that changes can never be good. Somewhere down the lane however, that changed and I am glad that it did. I never realized the extent up to which my life had altered until today.All you've got to do is hit the rewind button of your life and stop at the same date as today, the only difference being 2014 instead of 2015..you'd be lying if you say your life hasn't changed even a single bit..and if you're not then I am sorry, but, you, my dear friend are leading a very stagnant life. Don't just focus on the moments you cried your eyes out but also on all the new things that make you smile. Things are different, right ? That's how it has got to be..we just don't know it until we give it a thought. We all have the option of either embracing the change with a smile on our face or get stuck and never hit the "play" button..I'd definitely go with the embracing part because that way,I know I am going somewhere. So what if things are different, if they were supposed to be the same then why does the earth go around the sun and the months & the days & the hours change ?!! 

There is no forever in life..the concept of eternity itself is vague..there was a time before and there'll be a time after..your life depends on what you make of the time in between. 

Another beautiful quote to go with, "Change is inevitable, Progress is optional."

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Okay??

"Are You Okay?" A question that she had been asked millions of time in the past couple of months.

But today, as this question popped up in front of her, she just wanted to burst into a puddle of tears and wished that he would hold her tight in his grip as she vents it all out, how nothing in her life seems to be in place, how she wishes that, just for once,everything would work out as in her picture perfect novels but all she could do was look into his eyes and smile.

She did not say anything but deep down in her heart, she hoped that he would understand the silence that was deafening him. He was used to her blabbering and would get frustrated when she would play this stupid game of silence. She didn't want that obviously and she was trying with all her will..but you know how sometimes you just can't hold it all in.

Sure, there are times when we all want to be left alone and get lost in our own little world which is just perfect and so did she. She had fallen for a guy, unknowingly and the thing that she found the weirdest of all was, he was nothing like the characters she had loved all along. So yes, she was not okay..not because she was in love but because he did not know and she had no intention of telling him.

So, she went to her room, took out her Kindle, without which her fuzzy li'l brain would have exploded by now for sure and started reading The Fault in Our Stars. It was novels like these that made her question her feelings and that felt nice, thinking that maybe what she is feeling is not love after all and would just disappear after a while. This thought process of hers, though not true would help her calm down and she would go back to being the same old girl with an attitude that was both childish and mature at the same time, which he loved, obviously. 

Totally engrossed in the book, she was startled by her mom's voice calling her for dinner. She was just about to power off the Kindle and answer her mom's call when she read a line that put everything into perspective..It read, "Apparently, the world is not a wish granting factory."

She didn't know how and why but it was this simple quote that made her realize that she had to let it all go..no matter how much she didn't want to. She just had to loosen her grip a bit and it would all be fine,just like old times. Before turning off the lights, she gave their pic, sitting on the top of her desk, a cute li'l smile and said "I'm okay", only this time she knew that it was not a facade anymore.

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