And... her choice won!!

Picking up the key from under the flowerpot she opened the door to her apartment. She switched on the lights and lied down on the recliner, thinking about how her mom used to greet her with a hot cup of coffee when she returned from her tuition classes. Things were different now; she had always tried to be the perfect daughter for her parents but everything changed when she decided to make a choice for herself. The day was etched into her memory and no matter how much she tried she couldn't help but feel a little guilty and angry at same time.

It was her final year of college and she was buried under the pressure of her parent's expectations of getting straight A's in all the subjects. It wasn't like they asked her to but she could clearly see it  in their eyes. After a lot of deliberation and persuasion, she had made a choice of choosing Science as her major, for her parents. She was pretty sure that she could do it, 4 years of studying and a job after that. It all seemed simple to her then. So she gave up the thought of opting for literature, the subject where her heart lied and decided to make her parents happy, again. But she could not resist the temptation to read or to write whenever she got a chance. When under a lot of stress, she used to take out her favorite novel and get lost in her own world or take out her diary and pour her heart out, this was what kept her going. This and the fact that she was the chief editor of her college magazine. It was like she was living two lives, one which made her parents happy and other that made her happy. Then one day her phone buzzed and the call changed her life in a way she could've never imagined.

"Hello?", she answered. 

"Hello, I am calling you on the behalf of the The Night Owl. We read some of the articles you had sent to us last week and our editor-in-chief was dumbstruck reading those. He asked me to call you to see if you'd be interested in an internship and also, he'd like to meet you even if you're not", the voice on the other side said.

She had gotten so much on her mind lately that she had forgotten all about the articles, they were just random stuff and the only reason she had e-mailed them was that she was pretty sure she won't be selected no matter how much she wanted to be. Too many thoughts clouded her brain, what would she tell her parents, what if they didn't agree and the final one scared her - what if she never gets an opportunity like this.

It was when the speaker buzzed, "Hello, are you there??", did she realize that she had to make a choice, that too now. Without thinking about the what ifs she replied, "Yes, thank you very much. I would love to work with you."

That was the night when after a heated argument with her mom, she left the house not knowing where to go and what to do next. She called up the magazine to let them know that it wasn't possible for her to join indeed. Little did she know that the universe was with her, the magazine had liked her work so much that they were not willing to let her go for a reason so silly as this, so they offered her a paid internship and a small yet cozy room to stay until she figured out the rest.

6 months of internship and 2 years of dedication to the magazine, now she has her own column up and running in the magazine. She was an independent girl of 22, had a job which paid her to do what she had always dreamed of and she had her own apartment, not too huge but hers. She knew she had made the correct choice yet she hadn't dared to call up her parents after that night.

She was brought back to the present when she got a message. She unlocked her phone and the notification read, "One unread message from Pa." She was so overwhelmed that she was a minute late in reading it, however when she did it said, "I am proud to be your Pa."

 A tear escaped her eyes, she had so much to say but all she could type was, "Love you tons, Pa."

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Nostalgia

"It would have been fun if he was here with us...", while saying this to my sister, it struck me like lightning that things have changed after all. Going down the memory lane and thinking about all the crazy times I've had with them always puts a smile up on my face. Siblings - the people that you grow up with, the people you get so used to that you can not imagine getting out of your bed without seeing their face, the people with whom you fight like monsters but still never forget to share the last piece of chocolate with them or the people who sometimes get you pissed just by their mere existence. I never quite got the hang of being raised alone, the obvious reason being that they were always around.

You know how we always wish that someone would love us for the way we are, without any freaking changes, without complaining about your arrogance or idioticity or immaturity. Well, they do and we don't even realize it until one day when we are left only with the memories of the laughter and insanity. Since we went to same school, lived in the same city - within walking distance and celebrated all the festivals together, I always thought that's how it's gonna be forever. Little did I know that we would grow up and would have to think of stepping out in the real world and make decisions we never thought of making...I remember the day like it was yesterday when we couldn't find our brother anywhere in the house and panicked and searched almost the entire neighbourhood only to find him playing under the water tap in the backyard or his first day in school when he had cried his eyes out because his bubble of being in the same class as me had burst as I stepped out of the school van, leaving him behind or the time when I had fought with my sister coz I thought she had cheated in the game of ludo or the time when I used to throw the entire board of picnic game because I was too frustrated waiting for the six on their dice..Even today we laugh so hard at those little things....It had never occurred to me that those little things would take up so much room in my heart...

Yes, there have been times when they get on my nerves to an extent that I wish to throw them off a cliff but that's beauty of it all. You can not live with them peacefully nor can you live without them. I couldn't help but laugh when they get an earful from mum n dad. They can hit you in your face and you'd hit them back and you don't need a sorry to end the fight. A day of not talking to each other speaks for itself and then you bounce back to being normal and find other ways of ripping their head off. And the fun lies in not being the same at all. It's like north and south poles of the earth, like if you say day they'd say night and if you say black they'd say white. Each one has got such a weird sense of humour that others would call them retards but you understand it no matter what. They are the people who used to laugh like hippies when i cried over broken hair clips or freak out on not finding a book and I still would't mind. They were my first friends and will remain so forever. Life teaches you a lot many things in a lot many ways but they taught me to let things go, that not everyone you meet is not necessarily a carbon copy of yours and it's okay, you can still be the best of friends, that distance is not the problem if it's not in your hearts and most importantly, they made me realize that we all are extraordinary in our own lil ordinary way.

Then, one day we all got scattered, in different parts of the world figuring out what to do with our life. There were times when every single day was spent together and now we can do nothing but anticipate the day when we'd have a day out of our busy schedule. I guess we take a lot of things in life for granted..it's only later that we realize that of all the things that we fuss about, those lil things would be the ones that would make us nostalgic...

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The Dream

It was one of those days when you don't want to do anything but just sit in the balcony with a couple of blankets, feel the breeze as it brushes your face, look at the stars and listen to good music. Yeah, I do that quite often and trust me, it helps you forget about everything for a lil while and enter a world that's entirely your own. However, sometimes it so happens that amidst all this music and the breeze and the stars your eyes begin to close and you are not there anymore. You are soaring to a completely different universe where nothing could ever go wrong.

I didn't realize when I had dozed off. It was like, one moment I was enjoying the beauty of the stars and the next I was in a place which is probably the closest to a paradise I've ever been. The music still was playing loud enough only for me to hear. It was like a park for children the only difference being that it was angelic and transcendent. There were only a few children for such a majestic place. In fact, by the time I sat down on a bench there was just a lil girl playing with a cute puppy with black & white spots. After playing with the dog for what seemed like forever, she got tired and went to the water pipe. The sun rays were dancing on her hair which made it difficult for me to take a look at her face. It was not until she was done drinking water and going to the swing that I noticed something. I don't know how it could be true but the lil girl with fairy hair was me, just 12-13 years younger.

I guess I was staring at her too hard..she came to sit next to me. I was out of words but before I could come up with something, she decided to break the silence by saying, "You look pretty". I had never thought that a kid calling me pretty could flatter me so much. I was smiling when I answered, "Not more than you." That was the most I usually talk to unknown people but she was not a stranger to me so the words left my mouth before I knew, "So, which school do you go to?" One look at her face told me that this was a concept she was not familiar with. Maybe, they don't have schools here. Without answering, she shot another question, "Are you worried about something?? You look like you are." Now, that was a question I had been asked a lot of times but I did answer, "Not exactly. A lot of stuff goes on in my mind at same time. You won't understand. It's too complicated." She frowned like she was thinking hard of a solution and clapped her hands together like she had just made an unbelievable discovery and said, "Why don't you stay the night and then when we see a shooting star you can make a wish." I couldn't help but laugh, when she didn't seem to get it I explained, "Honey, there are no shooting stars. It's all science. You'll understand when you grow up." Utter shock crossed her face, I could tell she was furious but I had no clue why. I was saved the trouble for she exclaimed, "How can you not believe in shooting stars!!!" Now, as patient as I am, I was not up for explaining the concept of science to her when she wasn't even familiar with a school. "I am imagining all this, ain't I?? You're not real. This place isn't real", I pointed.She gave up asking questions and started saying things which were obvious according to her. She just wanted me to understand. "What a sad life you must lead!! You're afraid to accept that something so beautiful can indeed be real. You don't think that shooting stars exist which means you don't believe in magic. Why is a lot of stuff going on in your head at the same time complicated?? They are your thoughts, aren't they?? Why do you want to run away from them??" I am pretty sure she was gonna deliver a whole speech had I not interrupted, "We''ll meet after 10 years and I'll ask you the same questions and we'll see how you answer." She was bewildered at the interruption and stood up, like she was gonna take off. However before turning her back on me she did say, "I know what I am gonna wish for tonight. Never grow up."

This simple yet innocent wish had me in tears. I wanted to wait there, play with her-with myself, but someone was pulling me off my chair. It was my mom, "Get inside, it's freezing out here." I was furious at her for ruining the perfect dream so I stomped to my room without another glance at her. I tried to shut my eyes hard, wishing silently that the lil girl would come back. But she did not. The next morning while getting dressed, I looked at my reflection in the mirror and it struck me like lightning. It was weird but still made perfect sense. The lil girl had never left. She had been with me all along, silent but there. She is an intrinsic part of me, the one that believes in magic and shooting stars. It was this dream, that made me realize that it's okay to have tons of wishes which may seem unreal to people, that it's not foolish to believe in magic, that not everything is taught in schools, that things are only as complicated as you want them to be and that maybe growing up and growing old are not the same things after all.....

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Today, tomorrow & forever

Wasting no time in putting my stuff in the right place, I opened my window and stepped out in the balcony. Finally, after a tedious week,the much anticipated weekend was here, when he would come home. The lights in his room were still off, so I decided to lie down for a while, till he returns from his hostel.As always, I was eagerly waiting for him, to tell him how much I miss him and his 'full 'smile when he is away and how I hate the fact that our colleges were not close-by.We have been together, initially as friends & then a lil more than that, for the past 7 years, since I moved in to an entirely new place. You know how you just click with some people...he was one of the few. He lives next door and the fact that his balcony is just a couple of inches from mine is the cherry on the cake. So he jumps in when everything is quite and calm and peaceful and we talk for hours, sometimes just lie on our backs appreciating the sky, so full of stars. I don't know how it happened, when it happened but in the midst of all the silly talks and laughs, we had fallen in love. I remember the walk like it was yesterday..

We were lying down, watching the stars when he said, "Let's go for a walk.." I was a bit taken aback but agreed nevertheless. It was a perfect  night, when it's cold but not too cold to go out for a stroll. Everything was peaceful, just the way we liked it. He broke the silence by pointing at the park, "Remember that park??" I laughed, "Oh, how can I forget..you pushed me on the swing so hard that I fell down and didn't talk to you for an entire hour." He looked into my eyes this time, "Trust me, the silence was deafening.." we were not walking anymore, just standing in the middle of the street and he took my hands into his. Somewhere deep down, I knew what he was gonna say but I let him continue because I had been dying to hear it. "Listen", he began, "I've been meaning to tell you something. I know how you don't believe in love and how you think that no one's ever gonna fall for you..well, you cannot be more wrong, for I've fallen in love with you". I opened my mouth to speak but he shushed me and continued, "There is no other person with whom I'd imagine to spend my life with. My life would be meaningless without the sound of your laughter or the cheesy quotes from your crazy novels. You are just adorable when you say stuff that is childish and mature at the same time. You cry at the stupidest things one can ever imagine and I want to be there for you, to wipe off all the tears, no matter how stupid the reason was. I love the way you don't care how you look or talk or laugh or smile when you're with me..I love it even more when you can't dance but still try to because I insist and believe me or not, you are the only person I want to dance all my dances with..You think that people don't like your messy hair or the gap in your teeth but I love them, like you would be incomplete without them. I know you would consider all this idiotic but I promise to love you today, tomorrow and forever."

He caught a tear rolling down my cheek and smiled, "I can't promise to introduce you to Maroon 5 or Coldplay though." At this, I laughed and cried at the same time but said nothing. This was a lot to take into. The day I'd been dreaming about was here and all I could say was, "We should probably go home..It's getting late." He wanted to say something but looked at me instead and nodded. The walk to our home was silent but not at all awkward. I was lost in my thoughts and he was okay with it, which I liked about him a lot. We had reached his doorstep. He was just about to step inside when I held his hand and said, "Yes, I don't believe in love but that was because I never thought you would fall for me, and for me, no one else but you, was worth falling for..I have never anticipated the weekends as I do now, because that's the only time that I get to see you.You are the best thing that ever happened to me 'coz I don't have to put up a mask when I'm with you, I can be "me" and you find it completely normal. And everything you just said is the opposite of idiotic..You've got no clue as to how long I've been waiting for this moment." He was either surprised or shocked or both but showed me his full smile, the one that I loved when I whispered, "Yes, I love you to the moon and back, Today.Tomorrow. Forever."

He called my name and broke my trance and I rushed to the balcony to see him. "Whoa.." he took me in his arms and said, "Someone has been missing me." I didn't say anything but hugged him back tightly. "Wanna go for a walk?", he whispered in my ear. I looked up at him, and sure enough, he was grinning. I smiled and buried my face into his chest.His scent was so exhilarating that I could barely get the words out of my mouth  but somehow managed to say, "Only if it's with you..."

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